The past couple of weeks have been fairly pleasant. Gramma had a mild TIA again a couple of days ago but is recovering nicely. In spite of the bitter cold, wind and rain, I am determined to get Gramma out of the house and involved with other people. She is a socialite and loves to visit. She loves entertainment and cultural activities. On Monday I took her out in 15 degree weather to get her hair done. I had to wrap a scarf around her head and bundle her with a thick winter coat. I laughed when I looked at her because she looked like a little old Russian lady (Which she is!). I had forgotten about her being fluent in Yiddish (click for definition http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yiddish_language) and said "Now if you speak Yiddish, everyone will think you ARE a little old Russian lady. So...she spoke Yiddish the rest of the morning!!! She was cracking up!
When we got to the Wal-Mart parking lot, I had to try and convince Gramma to let me lift her out of the van because it is up so high that if she were to come down with her weight it would break her legs. She said there was no way she'd let me catch her. We were arguing and laughing hysterically. A BIG, friendly, smiling black man pulls up in an SUV and Gramma says "See if he'll help!" I was shocked because that was out of her comfort zone! Nevertheless, the man rolled down his window and asked if we needed help. We said yes and he graciously picked her up and set her down on the ground. She took his hand and said "God for you! God bless you always!" He smiled and said thank you.
This morning I realized that having Gramma here is the chance of a lifetime. For John and I, and especially for the children. I had to give Gramma a shower and took her upstairs and prepared her things. When I turned around, Sarah was unbuttoning Gramma's bathrobe for her and telling her to come to the shower. Gramma was tickled pink! She squeezed her and said "Oi, oi can you imagine this?" After the shower, Sarah proceeded to dry her with a towel and wanted to put lotion on her. She rubbed the lotion in her hands and rubbed it on both of her cheeks. She pulled her face to hers and gave her a kiss. I could have died and gone to heaven right then!!! She finished putting lotion on her legs and handed me her sweater.
When I think about how the entire family watches out for her, it makes me realize the value of this time for my kids. When any one of them sees her wandering around without her walker, they take her by the hand to a safe spot and retrieve her walker for her. My kids will always have compassion for the elderly and handicapped. They will be servants and they will not be uncomfortable or inconvenienced by the needs of the needy. I pray this stays with them. The value to Gramma is indescribable. She often says to me "What do people do that don't have what I have, what God gave me? There must be something we can do for them." She realizes the blessing of being cared for by her own family. She prayed thanks to God today for giving her this family and people to take care of her and love her.
She cried yesterday thinking that she had not bought Christmas presents for the kids and they would not have anything that was from her to know she loves them. I reminded her that we had shopped for the kids from her. She always wants to do for us. To give to us. This is a woman that knew little about the real lives of her children and grandchildren. She cared about status and success. She had friends and a social life and that was all she wanted. She was disappointed that "The Cousins" had all become financially successful and her kids had not "become something". Today, she feels we are the most amazing people on earth! She rarely asks about her friends but frequently asks about everyone in the family. This is not dementia, this is God! She remembers her friends but is not as concerned with their lives anymore. When she first came, she could not feel good unless her friends called her regularly and told her how good she had it.
Each day brings something new and wonderful, but each day also takes away something old and wonderful! We are thankful for them both. This Christmas season has brought so much joy and emotion. I thank God for each day with her!
My little babushka!
Gramma got her hair did!
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